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A Moment In My Life
Paul VerBurg
There
is a time in my life, one particular afternoon, which replays often in my mind and resonates for me as a true moment. A moment
in which I feel I was fully experiencing a cornerstone of my being. I remember the moment vividly, like a dream sequence
that will not dilute or subside. It was fall, late afternoon, and the light was slanted at that autumn angle the sun recedes
to after the high-noon heated tension of summer. The kind of light that warms your face yet shivers your shadow side, glowing
golden amber and soft. We lived in a remote area of forest in a campground and I was out riding my bike just before dinner.
I recall an exquisite feeling of timelessness in the air and an ancient scent that seemed to sting my senses. This combination
of natural phenomena has become for me a permanent signature of fall, and cemented this moment in my memory.
There
were times then, when, if you stood still, all you could hear were the trees. The silence could be deafening, although if
you pedaled fast enough, you could replace the abrupt silence of the forest with the sound of wind rushing in your ears.
I began just such an attempt by racing down “Red Knoll.” A wide circular lane that steeply sloped through the campground,
over a slight hump, then shot across the main highway and down the lake road where I lived; in all about half a mile in length.
From the top of the knoll, pedaling fast as I could, I began the run. Every stroke of my acceleration was timed as perfectly
as a NASA launch. Suddenly, in the midst of my flight, somewhere cosmic pieces fell into place, the light, the crisp air,
and the colors! I recall being keenly aware of my peripheral vision over my forward vision. I felt suspended in time; a
slow motion life, lived in split second sensory overload. It was the history of man condensed into a blink of an eye half-moment.
It was my life in zip drive! I felt eternity in a single breath! Giddy, I skidded to a stop to look again; a shake your
head double take. All I heard were the trees. It was as if I’d lived the meaning of life there in that autumn moment. It
was exhilarating!
I pedaled up the same road again: once, twice, fast, slow, faster, slower. I perceived only a shadow
of what had been my first experience. Before I coasted all the way home I knew I had experienced something unique. It wasn’t
a familiar shape or feeling that I had witnessed. But I recognized something on some level, and I’ve never forgotten that
bike ride! I have had a few comparable moments in my life: the first fall bite of pine scented autumn air, golden cast shadows,
the dual slap of cool wind and warm sunlight on my face and ears. Each of these has taken me immediately back to that autumn
afternoon on my bike in an emotional flood that wells in my chest and eyes with a quick gasp of eternity in a single breath.
all images and writings are copyrighted verburg studio
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